Posted by: minz | June 21, 2009

fathers’ day , brothers’ day

One thing that bind Santi and I together are the ideals we hold on to, belonging to  a fraternity/sorority if not for which, we would never have met. Some days, I question why I had so boldly allowed myself to be hazed– slapped, punched around by strangers  just to feel like I belonged somewhere. Same for him. How he survived the blackest day (literally because he fainted and saw nothing but black) of his life would probably remain a mystery until he grows old and gray. After (what we thought to be) the worst was over, we were taught, plainly and simply ,that we will live by one creed: The Word of the Grand is the Law. Ironic as it is for a bunch of law students to take it without so much as demanding for its printed, published version, it made perfect sense because there was none. It was a dictatorship by one man who called all the shots. If he wanted to call a meeting in the middle of class, we will MEET pronto. If he felt like brawling with another fraternity, all shirts are off. If he thought a brother did not deserve to be called such, out he goes. At 22, all of these just seemed pretty cool to me.What did I know?

Fast-forward to a couple-of days ago, when the shadows of one such decision made by one such grand came into the fore many years after the fact. A group of brothers thought this Grand whimsically and arbitrarily expelled one of us and now petitioned  to overturn the expulsion and bring the expelled brother back to the fold. Underhanded would be an understatement considering the Grand in question is in a seminar in Thailand and had no idea of what was to befall him. In one fell swoop, the expelled brother is a Red Rhoan once again, bypassing the  consent of the Grand who expelled him and that of the present Grand’s, under whose leadership the petition should have been brought to. In short, they took our law into their own hands and spat on it. Worse, they now seek to expel the Grand, himself, citing the flimsiest of reasons that shackles the mind.

Mulling over it now, knowing that my husband will not stand idly and watch a friend go down or his fraternity burn into ashes, I search once again for the meaning of it all and I come to only one. The Word of the Grand is the Law—this is the only law we know. Should we wake up one day not believing that one man can and should rule the way he does, WE go. Leave. Resign. Dis-associate. We don’t throw away the very bond that kept us together. We don’t disrespect a grandship.

I look at Santi’s disconcerted and agonized self as he gets ready for tomorrow’s meeting that will seal his own fate in this brotherhood and my heart breaks into pieces. On Father’s day , this is what I know. Here is a man who values family, friendship and loyalty. The last one  he will stake his life for.  And I love him for it.

Happy Fathers’ Day, B. You jump, I jump. I’m behind you all the way.



  1. I have an idea what’s this about, but I dont know the kwento behind. You mean, di alam ni Rogel? and di rin alam ng present grand yung nangyayari? so who made the decision? Ano gagawin ni Santi?

  2. He didn’t know at all, pauwi pa lang sya bukas. And they also want to expel him for reasons like customs issues na work-related.

    The present grand did not make the move–mga qc boys may pakana nito. Dinaan nila kay Godfather DAW. Now they are petitioning for Rogel to be expelled thru Godfather ulet–pag nangyari toh, magreresign kme ni Santi.

  3. aaaaaaaaaaaawwwwww! parang ganyan din ako ke Karr nun ah? :p

    ano naman yung customs-related issue na yan? me kinalaman ba yan dun sa case na parang ke Venny and Rogel? kasi me faction dun di ba?

    ang sad naman, nagkakagulo na kayo jan..kami dito, nakikitsismis lang…

  4. Luma na ung kay veny, ok na sila. Si veny pa nga nagkwento samen ng mga moves against grand–btw hindi sya pumirma sa reinstatement na un kahit friend nya un kse alam nya mali, walang consent si rogel at grand John.

    nakausap na ni coeli si rogel, paguwi nya daw gulo na. As for me, maikipagsulian ako ng kandila sa lahat ng kaibigan kong pumirma at pipirma pa. I’m formally saying goodbye to the qc boys. all of them.

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